How To Be Alone According To Walter


How To Be Alone According To Walter

Tip #1. There are some advantages to being alone. One being the absence of jerks. You are able to go about your quiet business without jerkiness, but calm, cool, steady collect.

But what to do, say, if you are the jerk? Then you are alone with the Loneliness Monster, and time alone is less tame.

Tip #2. Most monsters want something, mainly a cookie. Loneliness Monsters eat a lot of cookies. After it has eaten one or two or five, ask the Loneliness Monster what it really craves. Maybe it’s a friend, maybe it’s a new hobby, maybe it’s a 180 degree turn or a new way of thinking about something, or perhaps a nap. But you’ll never know if you’re out of cookies and time to listen. So keep well-stocked on cookies and self compassion.

Tip #3. Being a jerk is not the number one way to be alone. Being a real person is.

Think about it: you are a SomeOne with your own thoughts that no one else can think for you or overhear. We are all alike in our aloneness, which means the Popular Person, the Happy Person, the Healthy Person are all alone, just like you. Now you don’t have to wish for them to be alone to share in your cold misery. They already do.

Tip #4. Being alone together connects us in a weird way, and even more so when we express what Loneliness feels like for us. Words can help bridge the gap between us. That’s why books bring us together–because they are doorways into our separate worlds of Thought. Which brings us to the PRIMARY FACT that books are important and you should read them, ALL THE TIME, like perhaps one unfinished book named Walter.

Sorry for being so pushy. Way to be a jerk, Walter. If only I could eat a cookie.


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